Living with Terrorism
Posted: Sun 3 January, 2010 Filed under: Cynicism, Politics, Security, Thoughts, Travel 4 Comments »Over Christmas there was yet another terrorist “attack” in a plane over the US. And as a result, Fuhrer Brown has said that full-body scanners will be brought in to all the main UK airports because ‘they’re crucial in the fight against terrorism”. Which, frankly, is bollocks – the experts don’t even agree that the explosives used by Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab on Christmas Day would be found by a full-body scanner.
I’ve written before about Security Theatre, and really this is all more of the same.
What makes me really laugh though is all the shite that politicians spout about doing this “because we won’t give in to terrorism”.
- Every single time you take a flight and have to take your shoes off for a search, terrorism caused it.
- Every time you go through a full-body search from now on, that’s been caused by terrorism.
- Any time you can’t take a drink or shampoo abroad, that’s been caused by terrorism.
- Any time you read about ID cards or airport security, that’s been caused by terrorism.
And actually, for pretty much all the above items, you could replace “caused by terrorism” with “caused by the threat of terrorism”. Because most of it isn’t actually related to terrorist acts – it’s related to “plots”, rather than the real thing.
Basically, if you’re travelling by plane, you’re affected by terrorism or the threat of it. Every time you’re affected, you think about why you’re being affected. And bang, terrorism wins yet again.
In fact, the only recent occasion where terrorism really hasn’t affected things (yet, anyway) was the bombings in London on the 7th July. Certainly that event has made people more aware of the risk of terrorism and suicide bombers – but it hasn’t involved extra security checks, or changes to the way we live.
So wittering on about not letting terrorists win, while adding in new pointless security measures “to prevent terrorism”, that’s terrorism winning its case.
Self-Assessment
Posted: Tue 27 October, 2009 Filed under: 1BEM, Business, Cynicism, Domestic, Getting Organised, Security, Thoughts 3 Comments »Over the weekend, I completed – and sent off – my Self-Assessment Tax Return to Your Friends And Mine at HMCE. The deadline for receiving them is October 31st (i.e. this Saturday) so I’ve only just scraped it this year, having been really really good with it last year.
I know, I could do it all online, and have ’til January 31st to fill it in etc. – but I still don’t trust the online system. I wrote about this a couple of years back, and my feelings are still the same. Mainly, I’m happy to spend the money and use the Special Delivery stuff to get the tax return in – it just means I’ve got a signed confirmation that the Tax Return has been received where it’s been sent. I’ve been bitten by that before, the entire “Oh no, we haven’t received it” from HMCE. Of course, if you say you haven’t received something from them, it’s a case of “Well we sent it, so you must have received it”, but it’s not the same thing when it’s time to send stuff to them.
Basically, when it comes to sending documents to HMCE, it always pays to be paranoid. Always assume that they are either :
- Vindictive
- Inefficient beyond the dreams of man
- Both
and you’ll be OK.
It’s because of that – OK, it’s partly because of that – that I still don’t trust the online submission of tax returns. Yes, you can be pretty sure they’ve received it – but when it comes to HMRC, “pretty sure” simply isn’t sure enough. I feel the same way about HMCE’s online submission as I do about the people who store all their important data/files with Google, Amazon or some other internet cloud-based server – in other words, “Expect it to get lost. Expect it to get hacked.”
My tax return is on paper. Yes, I know it’ll end up being clocked in to the HMCE ‘System’. That’s fine. But letting their system be the only place it’s held? Sod that. I’ve got a photocopy of the tax return. I know where the figures came from, and I’ve got them recorded. I expect HMCE’s copy of the document to get lost, edited, hacked or mislaid. If/when it happens, I’ve got my own hard-copy backup. If you’ve done all the calculations on-line and not printed out the results (or even better, screenshots) and/or received confirmation from the system of those figures, what proof have you got of what you filled in?
Even if it’s simply that the electronic version gets corrupted, if HMCE also have it on paper then there’s some way they can recover the information without me even needing to be involved. If they only have an electronic version, then lots of people are going to be screwed if anything does happen.
So while I can, I’ll stick with doing my tax return on paper and sending it in to them. When they eventually go to “Online only”, I’ll still make sure I’ve got a printout of the entire thing, along with all the figures I’ve used to calculate it.
Call me paranoid, I don’t mind. Frankly, I’ve been kicked in the nuts by HMCE too many times to not be paranoid. And that’s not paranoia – that’s just common sense.
Three Nines
Posted: Wed 9 September, 2009 Filed under: Cynicism, Security, Thoughts Leave a comment »Of course, you also have to bear in mind that 911 was the main emergency number in the US well before the advent of 9/11, (or 11/9 – whichever you prefer) and there was always speculation that the date was chosen for exactly that reason.
As a result, I suspect there might be a few security agencies wondering whether 9/9/9 might be planned to be of similar significance/utilityin the UK…
Plane Stupid
Posted: Wed 9 September, 2009 Filed under: Cynicism, Security, Thoughts 2 Comments »I still find it hard to understand the certainty of the Government and Security Forces that terrorist attacks will happen again on aeroplanes. Maybe they know something I don’t.
To me, security – or at least the perception of security – comes about through making easy targets into harder targets. When it comes to home security, we don’t look at making our houses completely thief-proof. We look at making them into a harder target than my neighbours.
In my opinion, people in general – whether it be your everyday office worker, a burglar, a politician, or a terrorist – are lazy. They’re not going to do something difficult if they can do something easy.
On the terrorism front, airports are (in theory at least) the hardest target around now. Bear in mind though that I’m still a firm believer in ‘Security Theatre‘ – so airports at least appear to be the hardest target. They’re certainly more hassle than (for example) sitting on a bus or a train.
So I find it hard to understand that conviction that planes are still the prime target. Personally I’d probably be trying to look at anything but planes and airports.
How not to do it
Posted: Sat 25 July, 2009 Filed under: Advertising, Customer Services, Cynicism, Geeky, Security, Stupidity, Technology, Toyota IE | Tags: ian corbett, toyota ie Leave a comment »This post has been deleted, on the request of Ian Corbett, Marketing Manager of Toyota Ireland, and his legal advisers.
For more explanation, see here.