Festerous

ScroogeThis year I’m trying hard to not get ranty about the Festering Season – which is no mean feat, I can assure you.  (I’ve also just discovered that I’ve not used that Scrooge image for nearly three years in a Festering Season post, so welcome back owd fella)

After all, my local Tesco Tosspots had Christmas Cards on sale at the end of September, for fuck’s sake. They’ve had mince pies since August, but I didn’t even bother getting any photos of those.

Since then, it’s just been going on and on. Their tree went up (fully decorated) before Hallowe’en was done.  The foodstuffs have been in since November 1st.

I know shops need to have the time to sell all their festive shit. I suspect that they’re also stretching out the season ‘because of the financial climate’, allowing their customers to spread the cost of the Festering Season over greater time, rather than being crippled in December. I get that, and I don’t mind. (Too much)

It still narks me that everything is so obsessed with materialism, gifts, and the social-status inferred therein. I can’t help it. I don’t like seeing it in the shops for three damn months, or hearing poxy bastard carols on shop sound systems for two months. But it’s pretty much unavoidable – I try to limit my exposure to it all, but there still has to be some, sadly.

But I’m trying hard to not be too ranty about it. For now.  That may change over the next few weeks – after all, there’s still a month to go…


Following the Crowd – Again

Following on from yesterday’s post about charity, Children in Need, and doing what everyone else does, another current grouse is around Movember. It’s a great cause – raising awareness of male cancers, and raising funds for fighting them – but it’s another group thing.

In my office, every other male member of staff is doing it. And when you ask their motivations? Yep, it’s either “Well, everyone else is doing it, so I thought I would”, or “it’s for charity”. Yet when I asked them what charity it was for, at least half had no bloody clue, and aren’t even doing it to raise money.

Movember started off as a fun idea – but this year it’s got huge sponsors (including Gilette – which is kind of obvious, in fairness – and Three) but I just kind of get twitchy when it comes to charitable stuff with large corporate sponsors.

So yeah, if you’re going to do something that’s based around charity – at least support that charity, or know what the frick you’re talking about, rather than just following the damn crowd.


Following the Crowd

For many, many reasons – none of which I can really be chuffed with going into right now – I’ve grown up to be horrifically independent, both in action, life, and thought. One facet of that is that I’m sensationally bad at group activities, at doing what ‘most people’ do.

Today’s a case in point. I know I’ve waffed on about it before, but it’s Children in Need day, which is one of my particular bugbears.

“But it’s for charity, isn’t it?” is the calling-card of the day, assuming that if you’re not taking part and dressing up (or whatever) then you’re A Bad Person, and Uncharitable to boot. “Why not dress up, everyone else is doing it”.

And that’s part of my problem with the entire thing – it’s that ‘everyone else’ is doing it. Like Groucho Marx said, I’m not interested in being part of any club that’ll have me as a member. In the same way, if everyone else is doing something, you can be pretty damn sure that I won’t be.

The other side, when it comes to these days of charity and fundraising, is that I don’t like being conspicuous about which charities I support – and I like even less being forced (or attempts to force) to support charities because of how their perceived. I don’t publicise what I do, or who with, or why – because it’s no-one’s fucking business but my own. Being pushed to take part in something popular, into some fund-raising activity or other because everyone else is doing it, that can fuck right off.

So today, I’ll be in my corner, “Bah Humbug” hat and all. If you don’t like it, sod off. Go on, everyone else is doing it.


Missing the M1

I have to say, because of this I’m very glad I’m not commuting via the M1.

It wouldn’t have affected me directly, but from the traffic reports, the closures and rubberneckers were screwing things up for everyone else, so I’m pretty pleased that I was commuting in the opposite direction, away from the M1 entirely…

Oops - trucksplat

Oops


Utilities Part Two – Anglian Water

Following on from yesterday’s post about nPower’s abysmal customer service, I’ve also been dealing with Anglian Water for far too long since moving in to the new place.

It’s not been anything quite as drastic as the farce with nPower – at least Anglian got my name right from day one. It’s just they’ve never managed to get my bills right.

Part of the problem is the metering setup. For some godforsaken reason, my house (and the others in my section) all have two meters: one for the main property, one for the separate outbuilding. This seems to cause them no end of confusion – my first meter reading, they managed to put the same reading in for both meters which overcharged me on one by some sixty units!  Since then, despite no end of times telling them the outbuilding one only has a washing machine in it (and is thus epically low on usage) every damn bill or reading needs to be done twice, because they don’t believe the first one.  (Personally I’m not keen on what this also says about their attitude to their own meter-reading people, but we’ll leave that for now)

Compounding this has been an ongoing issue with their ‘outreaders’ – little grey boxes that (supposedly) connect to the main meter, and mean the meters can be read without the person needing to access my property.  Except that

  1. Some twat decided that they should both be situated within the courtyard bit between house and outbuilding. Yes, the bit with no access from the outside, without going through the damn house.  #slow_handclap right there.
  2. At no point have the outboxes read the same as the actual meters.

I’ve had Anglian out twice to have the outreaders recalibrated to the meters now, so one would hope they were working. But no…

Back in July I had a meter-reading done. It was one of the days I wasn’t working, so that was fortuitous. And then I expected a bill – it normally comes in August. Nothing.  So I called them this week to find out what was happening – the last thing I want on my record right now is a “late payment” flag, particularly for a utility company.

Only they hadn’t sent a bill. As usual, the outhouse’s meter reading had tripped all their flags, so they needed to check the reading. (Done by a person, don’t forget)  I said I’d do a reading that evening, and then they could sort it out. I also said I’d do both the outreader and the meter itself.

Lo and behold, the outreaders are under-reading by about ten percent. The meter on the house says 98, the outreader says 88. The one on the outbuilding says 22, the meter says 25.  Yep, they’re still buggered then.  Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind their readings under-reporting by 10% – except I also don’t want hassle at some future date when someone reads the meter instead of the outreader, and suddenly I’m getting hit (again) for 50 units more than I expected.

They’re now coming out on Saturday to fit two ‘smart meters’, replacing the existing meter and outreaders. Supposedly these ones upload straight to a website, so I can monitor the usage and see if there’s a problem.  Considering the issues so far with them, you can be damn sure I’ll be keeping an eye on those reading for the rest of the year!


You Shall Know Him By His Scent

At the new workplace, there’s one particular individual who – to be blunt – stinks.  It’s so bad that you can tell when he’s been somewhere, the smell lingers for a good ten minutes or more once he’s been in a room.

Personally I’m just thankful that I’m not sharing any space with him, and at the same time feeling true pity for anyone who does have to.

But what blows my mind is this : if you smell that damn bad, then

  1. Surely you can smell yourself, or at least be aware of that odour issue?  and
  2. Surely someone else has mentioned it to him?

With Option Two in particular, I really hope they have – I’d hate to have to be the one that breaks it to him. After all, I’m not the most tactful of people…


Driving Thoughts

A small selection of questions and thoughts from the drive in to work this morning…

1)  Look, if you’re driving so slowly in a car that trucks are pulling out to overtake you, maybe you should speed the fuck up, or get off the bloody road.

2) It’s foggy. So why are so many people driving

  1. without any lights at all or
  2. without their foglights on?

Usually it only takes a tiny piece of mist and they’re all in use, but this, with visibility of fuck-all-squared, there’s loads of people without lights. What the hell?

(And on a side note, bloody hell, I’m glad I’m not involved in this lot in Kent!)

3) Relatedly, why is it that once the fog clears up, you fuck-knuckle bastards leave your sodding foglights on ?  They’re there for a reason, remember to turn the cocking things off when they’re no longer necessary

4) Why is it that so-called “professional drivers” (articulated trucks, delivery stuff, coaches etc.) usually end up being the most dangerous ones on the road?

5) If that’s how you drive, Mr Driving Instructor, then I truly fear for the skills of your pupils.

6) If you can’t steer/handle a shopping trolley, it really scares me to know that you’ve arrived here by car, and will be driving home. Jesus.