Twat-Nav

Following on from the London visit last Friday, I’m now pretty damn sure that I’m going to be replacing my satnav at some point soon.

I’ve had this one now for a few years, and it’s always been a bit – quirky, is probably the politest term for it. (Downright vindictive would be another)

On Friday it pissed me off by giving plainly bad instructions – on several occasions. On two junctions it was indicating that I needed to be in the right-hand lane, and it was only through paying attention to it that I realised it meant “Oh no, not that right, I meant the right-hand lane of these two, you’ll be turning off again in a second. If you’re on that right-hand lane, you’ll be going wrong in 5.. 4… 3.. 2..”  That’s seriously unhelpful!  It also has a nasty tendency to tell me to turn/u-turn at junctions that don’t allow that to happen. If I were heeding only the twatnav, I’d’ve been in deep shit a couple of times, and probably have points on my licence as well.

When I was up in Derbyshire a couple of weeks back for the wedding it did similar things, as well as trying to send me some very dodgy routes including single-lane farm tracks. It was almost as though it was saying “I’m bored of direct routes and level ground – let’s have some fun!”  And while I’m happy with interesting drives, several portions were pretty fucking hairy indeed.

So yes, I think that it’s time for the SatNav to be retired / replaced. I haven’t got any major journeys now for a few weeks, so we’ll see. But its days are definitely numbered.