Forward Thinking

Last night, my drive home (less than twenty miles, all on motorway) took nearly two hours. The cause? A truck with a blown tyre, needing to get it replaced. Because it was an offside wheel, Health and Safety now apparently means that the inside lane needs to be coned off and closed as well, ensuring a safe (or at least comparatively so) workspace for the people replacing the tyre. And I’ve got to be honest, that’s one job I wouldn’t fancy.

I understand that need though, and it doesn’t annoy me. It’s one of those things – it’s not like the trucker planned it to happen, it’s just a facet of the number of miles trucks do. Shit happens.

But while that was the cause of the delays, it wasn’t the reason for the delays. The reason is something that does piss me off – shitty drivers (and particularly the so-called ‘professional drivers’ of trucks, coaches etc.) who don’t move out of the closed lane ’til the last possible second.

In this case, the ‘lane closed’ warnings were in place for eight or nine miles beforehand – and the delays went all that way back. And all of that distance, people were sticking into that lane that they knew was closed – that the signs were reporting as closed. I kept on seeing ‘professional drivers’ bombing down the hard shoulder as well, trying to avoid the stuck traffic. I truly hope those cunts got hauled in by the police and/or Highways Agency, but I’m willing to bet they didn’t.

The only time these (primarily truck-driving) fuck-knuckles moved out of ‘their’ lanes was once the cones were pushing them out, so they had to come in to the next lane, and squeeze in at the last second. It buggers things up, because the people already in that lane then have to move out, or brake and pause to let the fuck-knuckles in, and every time that happens, the jam behind gets worse.

If people moved out in plenty of time, paid heed to the road signs, and worked with the flow of traffic, the entire thing wouldn’t be anywhere near the hassle it proved to be last night.

Oh, who am I trying to kid? It’s never going to happen.