Table for Two

I didn’t link to this yesterday, primarily because otherwise I’d have just had a surfeit of cynicism – on Valentines Day?!? Me? Who’d have thunk it – but this piece on FireandKnives.com brought back many memories of managing pubs and hotels on Valentine’s Day.

As one high-end chef, anonymous for obvious reasons, put it “Everything shitty, clichéd, and horribly 80s gets wheeled out. Duo of lamb chops, cut to resemble hearts. Coeur a la fucking créme. There will be at least one nancying, ninnying chicken dish, especially for the ladies, and steak, which will be ordered by 80% of the men. Well-done, of course – medium if you’re lucky”.

Me? I used to run singles nights on February 14, and got in all the people who’d been displaced from their usual eateries. We made a packet out of it.


VD

Oh yeah, the header image up at the top of the page today (and for one day only)?

It’s a heavily cropped and buggered-about-with image of Al Capone’s infamous “Valentines Day Massacre”.

Very á propos


Reasoned Argument

Gordon, in a comment on yesterday’s *Barf* post, says

Why is he a wanker? Come on, gimme a reasoned argument!

So here we go…

  1. First off, he’s a wanker for wrapping the house. OK, supposedly it’s romantic. But what the hell is he going to do with 500metres (1,650 ft, give or take) of paper now? The git had better be recycling it…
  2. Buying a house for Valentines Day. The woman’s not even his wife. Personally, I hope she ditches the twat tomorrow, and keeps the house. Fair play to her. A stunt like this means he’s just begging to get screwed over.<cynicism>
  3. A direct quote from the article : “Last year, I just took her out to dinner which wasn’t much of a present, so I thought I’d better do something special to make up for it“.
    Need any more evidence of wankerdom?
  4. Directly related to the point above, this guy is the kind of knob who has to outdo himself every year. If he’s spent £500,000 this year, what’s he going to do next?
  5. At the end of the day, this has been done for Valentine’s Day. A marketing fest for overpriced cards, flowers, and sentiments. Buying a house? Kind of over-stepping the mark, me thinks
  6. Finally, another direct quote: “I can paint beautiful scenery and wildlife from my own balcony and Maria can enjoy the fruits of the private spa.
    I need say no more.

In other news, more sentimental cack for your delectation.


Taking the Piss

I was looking the other day at the Interflora website – as you do – and couldn’t help but check out the extortionate prices for roses etc., bearing in mind the proximity of Valentine’s Day.

Anyway, I had to laugh when I saw this particular bouquet, and particularly the price of it. One hundred red roses for £500!

So yes, that’s £5 per rose.

Some people have more money than sense…

And in the meantime, Happy Valentines Day. Or something.


*Barf*

There’s only one word for this ‘romantic’ man, who bought a £500,000 ‘waterside cottage’ for his girlfriend and then wrapped it all in paper, as a present. (Like she couldn’t figure out what it might be)

Wanker

Mind you, seeing as the story is on the news today, at least the surprise has been blown. Which makes me smile.


Spam Blocking

Since installing WP2.1, there seemed to be some fairly major issues with the set-up I’d got to combat comment spam. This is a geeky post, and if you don’t care, don’t click on the more…
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Bullying in Action

Last night, Psycho Cat came in out of the rain, to be faced by Hound, renowned for trying to bully Cat whenever possible.

However, Psycho Cat was not in the mood – so he sauntered past Hound, and on the way past, bashed Hound on the nose, and stalked off, with Hound running after him, utterly shocked at being battered by the Cat.

It was enormously bloody funny.