Trick or Tr-bzzzzzzzzzt
Posted: Mon 31 October, 2005 Filed under: Animals, Sweary, Thoughts 3 Comments »Ah joy, for tonight is
- All Hallows Eve, when darling little munchkins wander the streets done up in fancy dress, knocking on people’s door to chorus the jolly inhabitants with the traditional cry of “Trick or Treat!”
- bloody Halloween, when snot-gobbling little chavvy tosspots stalk the streets done up in cheap tat masquerading as fancy dress, bashing on doors to yell “Trick or Treat” when people open them, in the method known to all and sundry since the late 80s when ET made the fucking festival popular across the Atlantic
- Hallowe’en, when all (in)decent witches and pagans go out and sacrifice goat/child/dog to the gods of all that is unholy
I tend to be of the attitude that b) is the way to go. It’s not enough that Hound is currently stressed by fuckwit arseholes setting off fireworks at all hours of the day/evening/night, and is currently making use of vet-prescribed sedatives. No, we’ve now got to have the fucking doorbell going off to stress her out even more, closely followed by shit-for-brains hellspawn in sheets demanding sweets. Well, bollocks to them.
I’m considering linking the doorbell to the mains for the night. That should be an ample Trick to see the little sods off crying into their goody bags…
Actually I remember going ‘guising’ before ET came out, so it’s not just an American thing. The term trick or treat is though, and the looks you get when you ask them to do a ‘turn’ (to earn the goodies). Kids eh, don’t know they were born! (or however that, rather odd, saying goes).
When little gits come calling I usually use my mates way of getting rid.
Kids “Trick or treat?”
Me: “Trick.”
Kids: “Which trick do you want?”
Me: “How about piss off!!!!”
Never fails.
Or, you could try:
Kids: “Trick or treat?”
You: “Treat. Give me all your sweets, please.”
(NB: I am not brave enough to actually try this myself)